Coupons | Squirt

I opened the folder (yes, I actually checked my spam quarantine, as one does at 2 AM when insomnia hits). And there they were. Digital coupons for “Squirt.”

I consider myself a pretty savvy internet shopper. I have a separate email address just for loyalty programs. I know how to stack discounts at the grocery store. I’ve even successfully used a “30% off your first order” code for a pizza chain three times using different Gmail periods. squirt coupons

P.S. If you actually Google “squirt coupons” right now, you will get soda discounts on page one and therapy recommendations on page two. You have been warned. This is a work of satire. No bodily fluids were exchanged in the making of this blog post. Please drink responsibly. I opened the folder (yes, I actually checked

If they hand me a soda, I win. If they call security, I also win. I have a separate email address just for loyalty programs