Big Butt Road Trip 2021 📥

She wasn’t wrong. We are a family of “comfortable dimensions.” We like cheese fries. We have sturdy Dutch ancestry. And we had a wedding to attend in Nashville, 1,000 miles away from our home in Philadelphia.

If you are planning a trip for those with ample behinds, do not listen to the “ergonomic” racing seat people. You want a flat bench, or a couch on wheels. We should have rented a 1970s Cadillac. Instead, we made it work with pillows. The Snack Situation (A Delicate Balance) A road trip requires snacks. But a big butt road trip requires strategy. You cannot eat a whole bag of Cheetos and a gas station hot dog without consequences. The consequence, in a cramped car, is that you become a human space heater. big butt road trip

The sensible choice was to fly. But the fun choice was to turn our wide-load anxiety into a manifesto. We invited my brother-in-law, Dave (6’4”, 280 lbs, affectionately known as “The Lovable Fridge”), and the Big Butt Road Trip was born. Our first stop wasn’t a gas station—it was an auto parts store in Harrisburg. We bought three things: a gel-infused memory foam cushion for Dave in the back, a “purple” honeycomb seat cover for Lisa up front, and a seatbelt extender for me (no shame in the game). She wasn’t wrong

4 out of 5 stars. (Deducted one star because the Honda Fit’s cup holders are a crime against humanity. Added one star for the sheer joy of ordering a T-shirt that reads “I Survived the Big Butt Road Trip.”) And we had a wedding to attend in

Let’s get one thing straight right out of the gate: This is not an article about a Kardashian entourage caravanning through Beverly Hills.

We were stiff. We were tired. But we were laughing.

By Hank O’Hara, Special to The Asphalt Jungle